A bold, eye-opening memoir about survival, trauma, and healing from one of reality television’s most talked-about stars
In Nice Girls Don't Win Shallow shares the stories that allowed her to transform her most difficult moments into potent catalysts for empowerment. From her childhood growing up in a Florida commune run by a tyrannical female guru, to her journey out of the South and inside the L.A. casting rooms that would eventually drop her into the lush but brutal landscapes of Survivor, Shallow shows readers what it took to build herself into the ultimate survivor—for better, and more often, for worse. And then she reveals what it took to rebuild herself into something much greater.
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On sale July 8, 2025
Praise for Nice Girls Don't Win
“Parvati Shallow is the greatest player in Survivor history, but her book is not just for fans of reality TV. It’s a gripping and liberating read for anyone who’s ever been so desperate to please others that they’ve lost sight of themselves.”
– Adam Grant,
#1 New York Times bestselling author of Hidden Potential and Think Again
“Nice Girls Don’t Win is a bible for badass women. Smart, fearless, bold and intimate, Parvati Shallow’s writing manages to be both tender and strong: a revelation and a rallying cry. Shallow is an inspiration to all women who’ve been made into villains and owned it. Her journey is truly remarkable—
I couldn’t put the book down.”
–Sarah Michelle Gellar,
actor and star of Buffy the Vampire Slayer
“Survivor legend and gay icon, Parvati Shallow has won my heart all over again. Nice Girls Don’t Win is as fierce and biting as all her reality television appearances but reveals a new side of her—
one that is vulnerable and totally honest. This memoir blew me away.”
–Bowen Yang,
SNL cast member and co-host of the podcast Las Culturistas
“Parvati Shallow’s warmth and wisdom fly off these pages even more than they explode off the screen, which is a major feat. An important account of reinvention and lifelong trial by fire, Nice Girls Don’t Win is just like the woman who wrote it: honest, edgy and irresistible.”
– Matt Rogers,
actor and co-host of the podcast Las Culturistas
“Parvati Shallow is a glorious concoction of fluidity. She manages to be endearing but ensnaring, aloof yet vulnerable, sugar and spice. I can’t wait to see what else she has in store for us.”
– Alan Cumming,
actor and host of Peacock’s The Traitors
“Nice Girls Don't Win is shocking, insightful, compulsively readable, and unputdownable. Now more than ever, we need stories like Shallow's—stories that upend the misogynistic labels applied to women who dare to play the game of life according to their own rules. This book is for every woman who has been called a villain for having the audacity not just to survive but to win on her own terms. I can't stop raving about it.”
– Lyz Lenz,
New York Times bestselling author of This American Ex-Wife
“There's a lot to love about Parvati Shallow—her story and, by proxy, this book. But what separates this from your standard ‘phoenix rising from the ashes’ tale is the beauty Parvati conjures from the blaze she instigated and the time, space and grace she dedicates toward the work she did to heal herself — work that will no doubt fuel others in their own journeys. Parvati proves that the will and strength that led her to her Survivor victory was anything but a fluke, but rather a marker in a journey toward self-enlightenment.”
– Evan Ross Katz,
entertainment journalist
“What does it take to survive? Not just a game show but girlhood, womanhood, a broken marriage, single motherhood and family loss. Shallow’s bravery on the page is raw and revelatory. She effortlessly speaks to the paradoxes of “badness,” femininity, popularity, escapism, grief and resilience with grit, guts and a power that questions authority and sings with self-awareness. At its core, this is a book about letting go: the most courageous act of all. I’m in awe.”
– Rebecca Woolf,
author of All of This: A Memoir of Death and Desire
“Nice Girls Don’t Win is an expansive, beautiful memoir that’s fiercely feminist and radically honest. An inspiring meditation on trauma and cycles of fear and shame, Parvati Shallow lays bare all of her struggles and how she’s come to recognize them as essential to her story. This memoir is a must-read for anyone looking to find their own path to healing and self-acceptance. I can’t recommend it enough.”
– Tara Schuster,
author of Glow in the F*cking Dark
“Survivor champions all have some sort of intangible ‘it factor,’ and out of those, there is a handful that stand above the rest. If you were to carve a Mount Rushmore of reality competition, Parvati has to be on it. This book tells the compelling story behind the obstacles and difficulties she overcame in her personal life to become the competitor the world has come to both fear and love.”
– Joe Mangianello,
actor and host of Deal or No Deal: Island
Photo: © Mark Squires
Parvati Shallow is a mother, winner and five-time competitor of the hit TV series Survivor, and breakout star of The Traitors on Peacock. She holds advanced certifications in yoga, meditation, and breathwork and is a passionate student of various healing and therapeutic modalities including structural integration, Somatic Experiencing, acupuncture, nutrition, sound healing, hypnotherapy, IRF, IFS, and many more.
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